A list, some pictures and HRP.

Five things that I'm grateful for today:
1. My internet connection worked and I was able to load all my pages.
2. Dreamed about really good things and woke up remembering 'em.
3. I was able to take really GREAT pictures of one of my ninjas.
4. Talked to my Ducky and we're on Day 3 of our No Fighting Week.
5. I'm alive, loved and can love.

Some pictures:

HRP
I'm in a really great relationship and because of this, I'm not quite sure how to proceed. I've only ever been in really horrible, really painful relationships so I'm treading on unfamiliar territory. Because of this, my insecurities are surfacing and I've been picking fights with my boyfriend... a lot. I really don't want to argue or even quibble but somehow, I can't seem to stop myself. My insecurities are causing my boyfriend and I some really potentially devastating problems and only recently did I find an explanation as to why I'm the way I am this time around. (God my grammar has gone straight to hell.)

Anyway, I'm suffering from what's known as HRP or Happy Relationship Paranoia. I read about it in a webcomic that, of all people, my boyfriend linked me to. In the comic, HRP is described like so, "It's when you're in a great relationship, but can't stop worrying that you'll fuck it up or that it's gonna end somehow."

Now that I know what it is, I can be more aware of what I'm doing. Just recently we declared a No Fighting Week and so far, it's going great.

A Round Up
There's more but I'm so lazy to sum everything up. Maybe next time.

Inspiration.

I follow a lot of blogs and as a result, I get inspired by their nifty little ideas and awesomely inspired posts. And because my Mom keeps telling me I need a shot of bliss in my life, I decided to "follow" these awesome people's leads and see if posting about the stuff that makes me happy can actually make me happy. Convoluted but it makes sense in my head. S'what matters, really.

So here goes...

But first, here are a few pictures.

Can't we all just get along?

After much cajoling and groveling from me, a couple of time outs and the threat of losing their computer privileges, these two decided they can, after all, be friends.

I love happy endings.

My fortune for the day.... PORK!

New toy alert. Fortune Pork Series 2. His name is Woggle. And I love him to pieces. That is all. Life is just too complicated and depressing right now to warrant a post so this'll hafta do.

Rainy day blues.

When was the last time you held hands with your significant other? Or just spent the day huddled together under the covers, giggling like fiends over shared jokes... when you last shared a sandwich or a pint of chocolate ice cream? Or when you last spent the day just being together, catching up on each others' lives, making up for lost cuddling opportunities?

Sometimes we forget to stop and just appreciate that when we reach out, there's a hand waiting to take hold of us. We take for granted that a cuddle is only an arm's length away... that a kiss is just a few feet away, in the other room.

I have a boyfriend. A really great one. He loves me and tolerates my many moods. He understands my obsession with toys and sometimes (ok, most of the time...) indulges my whims. He is patient with me despite my legions of flaws and insecurities and petty demands. He talks me through really tough times and comforts me with promises of better days. He surprises me with random emails, peppers me with sweet texts and he calls me babygirl. I'm a very lucky girl, indeed. There isn't a day I don't thank the heavens that I have him in my life.

Everything would be perfect if only he didn't live across the ocean. A bajillion miles away from me. And so everything we do, I horde away for when I need to cuddle. Everything he tells me, I try to remember for the days when I need to be reminded that somebody loves me. All our conversations, savored and recalled during rainy days when all I really want to do is huddle under the covers, with him... giggling over shared jokes, catching up on each others' lives.