I lost count on how many times I picked up my phone today to text him because I saw something or thought of something that I wanted to share with him... only to remember that we're broken up. I need for all this to end soon. I need to forget. I need to stop torturing myself and just get it over with. It's not going to get any better, ever again. Who am I kidding? This was my last chance at a normal, happy relationship... despite it being abnormal because of the distance... Heh... it's not like I went into it not knowing there was an expiration date... I just didn't count on it being this painful. If I had just stuck to my guns and kept it simple, before I got too involved.. you know that saying, "tis better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all?" whoever said that is completely and utterly full of shit... because if you're not gorgeous, sexy and rich... if you're just a below average woman with absolutely no redeeming values, then love is just another fucked up four letter word... because you'll never be enough... never be worth fighting for. Ever.
Oh girl, you are so much more than that! You ARE worth fighting for...and I know I don't usually say this on a blog and you may or may not post it but I know you'll read it. Someone DID fight for you...a long time ago. He died doing it, but He's there now, feeling your pain and loving you so much more than you can ever imagine. You are His princess. You are His queen. You are his light and the beloved of His soul. <3
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